Homes for rent new richmond wi
Housing For All
2019.07.25 08:00 workplace_democracy Housing For All
De-commodification of housing Rent control Housing coops High quality public housing Tenant's unions Community land trusts Vacancy taxes Good cause eviction clauses Right of refusal laws
2014.03.03 23:24 zoeypantalones RVA Housing
For all your housing needs in Richmond, Virginia. Post when your lease is up, roommate requests, housing requests, etc. VA Legal Aid: https://www.valegalaid.org/issues/housing/landlord-and-tenant-issues
2015.02.08 03:01 Im_More_Of_A_Lurker_ Ocean City, New Jersey
A guide to what's going on in Ocean City, New Jersey . . (Not to be confused with /OceanCity in Maryland)
2023.03.25 11:13 straycanoe In Praise of Cultivating Gratitude and Mindfulness
I've been receiving a lot of help and guidance with walking the sober path. Everyone I know seems to be rooting for me, and the professionals at the public mental health and addiction clinic in my city are wonderful, brilliant, supportive people. They've filled my toolbox with many useful skills for facing all kinds of difficulties, whether they come with addiction, or merely from the stresses of everyday life. For us here, certainly, those things are intertwined.
At the core of what they teach at the clinic is mindfulness. It's amazing that something as simple as concentrating on my breath for a few minutes a couple times a day can have such a huge effect on my mental state. Nothing I've ever done has helped me manage anxiety and understand my own mental processes as much as therapy focusing on mindfulness practice.
I've also learned how effective it is to speak affirmations to myself in the mirror every day. It felt a bit silly at first, or maybe I just didn't believe myself as I said things like, "I am relaxed, happy, and confident without drinking alcohol. I'm kind, smart, and people like me. I am not defined by my past. I have the power and the responsibility to shape myself into the best person I can be." But, I have learned to trust the process, and I've kept it up for months now, no matter how uncomfortable it felt. After I say affirmations, I speak aloud five things that I feel grateful for. That part is easier, and both have started to come more naturally over time.
And guess what... because of something in the way our brains work, I've begun to internalize and believe the words I speak aloud to myself, and the new, positive thoughts are becoming automatic.
When I look around my home and my neighborhood, I see that I am surrounded by countless things to be grateful for. When I think about my relationships, or when I'm in bed thinking about interactions I had that day, all the positive outcomes are in the spotlight, instead of the minor slips or misunderstandings that I used to obsess over. When people give me a compliment, at least part of me believes them. I properly engage with people in conversation, and I'm finding that the right words come when I need them.
I am unaccustomed to feeling this confident. I look in the mirror and like the person I see there for what feels like the first time since I was very, very small.
I can't overemphasize that the single, most important step I've taken for my mental health has been quitting alcohol. Mindfulness, gratitude, and affirmations are incredibly useful, but I think they're working their best because I finally have enough mental clarity to understand my own thoughts and emotions, and to begin to direct my life's path, rather than feeling like I'm drifting along at the mercy of forces beyond my control.
Yes, there are things I'm powerless to change, but what I can change is myself. That is a gift I believe we've all been given, and for it, I am grateful.
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2023.03.25 11:12 ATSbouquetnoida Commercial Projects in Delhi With Assured Return, Omaxe Karol Bagh
| || | submitted by ATSbouquetnoida to u/ATSbouquetnoida [link] [comments]
The new commercial property in Karol Bagh, Omaxe Karol Bagh
is an exciting development for the area. Located in the heart of Delhi's bustling capital city, this project offers a fantastic opportunity to invest and benefit from its strategic location. The area has seen significant investment over recent years with many businesses choosing to make their home here due to its proximity to important government offices and key business hubs like Connaught Place. With Omaxe’s modern design and construction techniques, it will be sure to add value both economically as well as aesthetically. https://preview.redd.it/zc040jec1vpa1.jpg?width=1280&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=25cba08cb0cb9e2ddf40f95f72453587ecbd09bd Omaxe Karol Bagh
offers a range of features that make it attractive for potential investors looking for prime real estate options within the city limits. It boasts spacious office spaces equipped with state-of-the-art amenities such as high speed internet access, air conditioning units along with other facilities like gymnasiums & swimming pools which are ideal for corporate meetings or leisurely activities after work hours . Furthermore , there is ample parking space available so you can rest assured your vehicle won't be left stranded on crowded streets during peak traffic times . Lastly , security measures have been taken care off by installing CCTV cameras throughout the premises ensuring safety & surveillance round -the - clock . https://preview.redd.it/bxtpua1d1vpa1.jpg?width=1045&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=15591e27b0e0f37a8f6471204cefb44e96e47ae7
In conclusion , investing in commercial properties at Omaxe Karol bagh seems lucrative considering all these advantages coupled together makes it one of most sought after destinations amongst businessmen looking out for premium locations within Delhi NCR region . Moreover, given its close proximity to major landmarks such as RamLila Grounds & Red Fort adds more value making this project worth giving serious consideration when deciding where your next business venture should take place !.for More help visit my site:- https://omaxekarolbagh.org/
2023.03.25 11:12 Dismal-Needleworker7 Possibly moving schools
TLDR: I’ve had a great first year but am considering leaving my school.
I (sped teacher) am apart of the teaching collaborative and in the bronx. I’ve had a great first year with a mostly supportive admin and teachers. A lot of difficulties, but I feel I’ve done the best I could and have heard nothing but positives from admin. I have one class that is difficult, super disrespectful to everyone in the room, and do not listen. But other than that it’s okay. But one of my grade team leaders recently told me “as a friend” that I should find a new school. This was right after a meeting she had with all the mentors. I was caught off guard because. Literally everything has been positive. Because she’s over me, it’s difficult to hear and determine if it was as a friend or from admin. I do know that they asked another first year teacher to look for a new job just last week. Pros to leaving: getting away from students that have stolen from me, potentially being closer to home, being away from a negative staff. Cons: starting over, losing friends, navigating new admin and Co teachers, asking to pay to DOE back almost $1000 for a tuition stipend. Any advice?
If I do leave I am limited to what school districts I can teach in due to me being in the NYCTC.
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2023.03.25 11:10 Hearagain3 TYPES OF SPEECH THERAPISTS FOR CHILDREN
| || |https://preview.redd.it/6b8l65wy0vpa1.jpg?width=1350&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0d795bcbd582bc2e723b46a4c0ce72ff5e84029a Introduction submitted by Hearagain3 to u/Hearagain3 [link] [comments]
Communication is an important knack that one needs to develop just after birth to interact with people. The skills of communication are essential to be developed so that you can correspond with people and able to share thoughts smoothly. But, As there is medicine for every ailment the ailment for every condition is there so as in speech. Where people have different types of speech disorders that they need different types of speech therapies to overcome their communication problems.
What are speech disorders and what are their types?
What is a speech disorder?
A speech disorder is a condition in which the individual finds trouble producing sounds or understanding language. Speech disorders can be caused by physical damage to the brain, such as from stroke and seizures, but they can also be caused by conditions like laryngeal incompetence which is mainly caused by an injury, due to several Neurological and psychological disorders such as autism spectrum disorder and developmental language disorder (DLD) which makes a person hard to deliver the words, proper pronunciation and even elicit sound.
Types of speech disorders:-
Role of Speech therapy
Speech therapy is important for anyone who has a speech disability. It can help you communicate better by helping you speak more clearly, understand what other people are saying, and improve your communication skills.
It’s an important part of the overall well-being and development of children. It can help in
• Language development
• Communication skills
• Social skills
• Correction of phraseology
• Improvement in speech disorders
Types of speech therapy for children
1. Speech Therapy for Stuttering:-
2. Speech Therapy for Apraxia of Speech:-
3. Speech Therapy for Aphasia:-
- Speech Therapy For Swallowing Difficulty:-
1. Speech therapy for stuttering:-
Speech therapy is proven important for people with stuttering problems. It helps you to observe when you stutter and minimize the speed of your speech accordingly. This speech therapy needs sluggish speed initially it gradually increases with time until you start speaking normally.
2. Speech therapy for apraxia of speech:-
In apraxia of speech, the child knows what to ask or what to deliver it’s the brain that tells the wrong signals in the movement of the mouth muscles.
It is also known as verbal dyspraxia or developmental apraxia.
Causes behind CAS in a child
• Due to brain damage.
• Complications in childbirth.
• Genetic disorder.
• Any severe brain injury.
The child has to take therapy sessions twice a week better if you prioritize group sessions.
• Organizing mouth movements needed to speak.
• Practice sessions of scheduling mouth muscle movements
3. Speech therapy for Aphasia:-
The treatment is dependent upon the speech therapy approach done by a speech-language pathologist. Some SLPs approach individual methods some approach combination of therapy but it should be well-researched with evidence that it has an impact on the patient.
What SLPs are going into speech therapy for apraxia? •
Intensive practice of the targeted words during the session. •
As CAS is a motor-based disorder the therapist focuses on movements of the mouth for the proper word flow rather than sound. •
New targets are practiced as specific targets while older ones are frequently revised. •
Therapists give directions to the patients like” slow the movement of the mouth” or “you are doing it right”. •
Giving daily homework includes, repeating sounds, rhythm, uses of pauses, etc.
4. Speech therapy for swallowing difficulty
Swallowing difficulty is also known as dysphagia. The term is used for the condition where a person is unable to chew or swallow food due to some reasons. Here SLPs provide therapies to patients with swallowing difficulties to help them eat and swallow food properly.
Speech therapy for swallowing difficulty has three types:- •
Bedside Dysphagia Evaluation:- Visual examination of the swallowing condition. Keen observations on mouth jaw muscles and try to evaluate which suits best according to the condition. •
Modified Barium Swallow Evaluation (MBS):- It is done by a radiologist to watch the journey of barium-coated food which gives an accurate report of what is better in swallowing and what is stuck inside the mouth or throat. •
Fiberoptic Endoscopic Evaluation (FEES):- where a radiologist will put a small fiberoptic tube from the nasal to observe the activities of the sound box and upper esophagus at the time of swallowing.
They give some exercises in homework like swallowing saliva every 10 minutes, Saying the word” HAWK” and Some movement while eating twice or thrice a day.
Different types of speech therapy
1. Speech Therapy for Fluency Disorder:-
A fluency disorder is a speech disorder that makes it difficult for someone to speak clearly and fluidly. It can make it difficult for an individual to figure out what they are saying, or even to understand themselves. There are several methods for treating a fluency disorder:-
Speech therapy utilizes feedback from patients to assist them to improve their speech patterns. This method uses recording equipment like a recorder or tape recorder so that the patient can hear themselves speaking back to them. The speech therapist will then advise changes in the way the person speaks or sounds until they feel comfortable speaking without stuttering or slurring their words again.
2. Speech therapy for an articulation disorder:-
speech therapists know how hard it can be to overcome a speech problem, it can be frustrating to try and say something that hasn’t come out right, but when you get your speech back together again, it’s amazing how much better everything sounds!
When a therapist started working on articulation disorders, they knew some things would help make my job easier. So they started using these techniques: 1)
Always ask the patient what their goals are before getting started. This lets them know what they want from therapy and gives them an idea of where a therapist needs to begin. 2)
Make sure the patient has a good understanding of the language being spoken before starting therapy. If you don’t understand the language well enough, then it will be hard for therapists to try to teach you how to speak clearly and correctly. 3)
If someone is having trouble with their pronunciation or fluency, practice speaking slowly and clearly to observe the absurd.
3. Speech therapy for swallowing difficulty
An SLP is assigned to treat swallowing difficulty cause due to several know and unknown reasons. SLP apply techniques according to the condition of the patient: •
Visual assessments of the movement of muscles •
X-ray procedures to get perfect results behind the disorder. •
Eat smaller food •
Frequent meal schedule •
Mouth Muscle exercises •
Slow chewing and slow swallowing etc.
5. Speech therapy for dysarthria
Dysarthria is a sudden change in the ability to speak properly. But it can be solved by regular therapy sessions that involve:- •
More breath for a louder pitch. •
Muscle exercise to make the mouth muscles stronger. •
improves articulation •
Enriching breathing support. •
Adjusting speech rate. •
Frequent communication practice with family members.
6. Speech therapy for late talkers
As late talkers generally see in the childhood phase it involves various activities to overcome the problem from the root like:- •
Model good speech •
Frequent speech practice at home. •
imitation of certain targeted words in front of your kid. •
Daily homework •
Making certain sounds and hand signs to understand clearly what you want to say to your child. •
Repetition of certain complex words. •
Practice sessions of targeted words and revision of older targets.
If you find any of your dear ones facing problems in speaking, then do visit the best speech therapist in Gurgaon
Hear Agin at once. Hear Again has a lot of information to share with you about your child’s speech and language development. Hear Again is the most reputed best hearing aid in Gurgaon
and has years of work experience and is the best Audiologist in GURGAON for occupational therapists Gurgaon and also for treating ailments such as speech therapy,
They’ll give you a complete physical exam and discuss any concerns they have about your child’s health. Best Speech therapists will also talk with you about what kind of assistance your child needs. For example, if your child has auditory processing issues, he may need extra time in groups for language labs and practice periods. If he has trouble articulating words into sentences, the speech therapist may recommend that he participate in an intensive phonics program during his recess period.
2023.03.25 11:09 Stellalunathebat Rant about what Helped my Dizziness
Ironic that I'm posting this at 5 AM bc my sleep is fucked up.
In Jan I posted about sudden dizziness that landed me in urgent care with ongoing test results that showed absolutely nothing wrong with me. I started having extreme fatigue, and ongoing dizzy spells. It was so bad, I quit my job and remain unemployed for 2 months. I am still dizzy today, but a lot better. My revelations:
List of suspects: 1) I am more depressed/ anxious than I've ever been in my entire life. 2) I am in the worst shape I've ever been. My BP is high and so is my cholesterol. 3) Persisting neck / shoulder pain 4) Poor diet, sleep habits, lifestyle choices 5) Allergies
The worst part is it all started in yoga where I'd been trying to better myself. Returning has been sad, I can't even sit and stretch without being breathless / dizzy.
Correlating remedies to the above I've tried.
1) Doc put me through all the blood work / labs which came back normal and asked if it's possible I'm just deeply depressed. Idk what to say to that but I quit my job which was a huge contributor to my depression. I took two months off and spent it trying to fix myself.
2) Exercise helps general depression but tbh, I felt so bad (physically) I could barely get out of bed some days. Slow walks outside and seeing sun helped. Also, temporarily on bp meds.
3) Neck / shoulder pain severity HIGHLY correlated to my dizziness. Meaning the worse the neck pain, the worse the dizziness as well.
I chucked out my old bed and went through two trial runs of mattresses; an absolute PIA. Also, PILLOWS!! My cheap Costco pillows which I actually enjoyed were tossed out in favor of something more supportive. I am apparently the goldilocks of pillows; not too dense, not too fluffy. I spent 1.5k on a new bed and $100 on a new pillow and I sincerely believe this was the key to alleviating my dizziness. Shoulder and neck pain much better. Pillow selection was not by comfort, rather I tried different ones that alleviated my pain. I actually found that what worked for me was not necessarily what I found most comfortable.
4) Poor sleep (ex: me rn) HIGHLY correlated to extreme fatigue and mildly correlated to dizziness. Even if I'm sleeping til noon, I try to get 8 hours. Currently trying to fix my sleep rhythm.
Cut dairy which is large contributor to general inflammation/ unwellness, per my rheumatologist. (Dependent on ethnicity.) Miserable, I miss milk but I can physically see the difference in my skin and how I feel. I drink oat milk now.
Lifestyle wise, I keep a tidier home. I spent my time off becoming a reseller to get rid of all my hoarded stuff. My hoarding caused a lot of dust and poor house hygiene. This helped with better air quality, leading to better sleep and general wellness. Also, making my bed every morning is strangely therapeutic and happy.
5) Allergies actually causes a LOT of unexplained illnesses. I see an allergist for other health issues and it can cause dizziness, acid reflux, stomach upset, inflammation, headache, fatigue. Far more than your seasonal sniffle. Aside from the poor support and backaches caused by my very old bed, I'm convinced it was infected with every allergen and pollutant out there. Finding the main source of my allergies has vastly improved my life. I breathe, sleep, and live better.
Final thoughts are that these are general things that everyone has already heard. But it really is a slow trek towards figuring it out and getting better. It took a lot of reflection to figure out what was not working for me in my life.
Perhaps my hypochondriac ass is dying of some hidden disease, but I'm trying to convince myself that maybe it's a lot of small wrong things culminating in disaster. I'm trying to fix them one by one.
I also still think I have underlying and undiagnosed health issues which are causing joint pain. Although the bed and pillow helped immensely, I suspect there are other health reasons causing my neck and shoulder pain.
Maybe nobody reads this, not even sure it's helpful but I really can't sleep and needed to vent. ✌️
TLDR: tossing my bed basically alleviated 80% of my issues including dizziness. Also, pillows.
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2023.03.25 11:08 Verrgasm Desperation
My foot pushed down harder on the accelerator as my stomach cramped up again in a painful spasm. I was speeding through a schoolzone, and as a sign popped up on the side of the road clearly stating '20' I snapped out of my desperate panic and reluctantly dropped from '40' down to '25'. Turning a corner I realized to my horror that it was three o'clock, and the street was mobbed with parents buzzing in and out of the building to collect their children.
I turned to look behind me and I nearly lost it, my asshole puckering as I sucked the poison back inside. I was completely boxed in. Another four cars had already trapped me inside. I smashed the horn, pleading with the traffic on either side to budge. They didn't.
After a gruelling seven and a half agonising minutes and a half hearted search for some sort of viable receptacle and something other than socks to wipe with, the blockage finally gave way. The cars slowly began to move forward. Eagerly creeping behind, I saw the problem. Somebody had broken down right there by the school gates, having finally been repaired and sent along. A wave of relief washed over me as I considered the short journey ahead. The Porsche dealership was a little over a mile away. A dealership which had a bathroom, one I'd used before. Afterall, that's where I'd bought my car. They knew me, and I knew I'd be able to breeze on in, no questions asked. A deep growling rumbled out over the radio and I put my foot down again as soon as I broke through onto the main road. Just a straight shot, and it would all be over.
Not a minute passed until I was once again utterly dismayed, near losing all hope; ready to just give up right there and then and ruin a perfectly decent pair of black suit pants and the interior of my beautiful brand new Porsche's two-colour interior, characterized by a perfectly coordinated interplay of colours, materials and individual finishes suited just for me. A red light shone in the distance, and in its wake sat a long line of idling cars. Lesser cars, all in my way. My gut quaked violently and sharp pains erupted all through my midsection, sweat pouring down my back and growing sticky in the afternoon heat. I peeled myself from the smooth-finish leather, craning my head out the open window just enough to get a good shout across and I screamed as loudly as the rapidly building pressure would allow, but once again my efforts were futile.
Another minute, now five since I first stared down the crimson cyclops - FIVE minutes at a red light - before at last I was granted passage as everyone finally moved along. Taking their sweet time, of course. I took the left, screeching into the Porsche customer parking lot. The engine stayed on and the keys stayed in, I didn't even close the door behind me. There was no time. The car was the least of my concerns at that point, there was only one thing on my mind.
Shoulder-barging through the glass doors, it's as if my vision became tunneled as I focused in on that bright shining door located at the far wall emblazoned with the sign identifying it as a toilet. And only a little bit past two rows of Porsche's that were only slightly better than mine, I was so close. An audible grunt escaped my pursed lips. As I rushed past the reception desk, something grabbed me. It was Gina. Fucking Gina.
"Mr Kleinfeld? Hi! Lovely to see you again! There aren't any problems with the car, are there?" She looked concerned on the surface but only about as far as it might affect her status as the dealership's top salesperson that month.
"What?!" I caught myself before I let slip just how much pain I was in, confused as to why I wasn't just making a break for it. "Oh? No it's… it's amazing. Fantastic, even. It's just… the thing is…"
Gina raised an eyebrow behind her thick hipster glasses. Functional, yet chic. Now appearing sincerely concerned.
"CAN I USE YOUR BATHROOM!?" The words piled out fast and hard in more of a shriek than a polite request. Gina took a small surprised step back before replying apologetically,
"I'm so sorry, but it'll be closed until at least Five. We've had a plumbing issue this morning a-"
My bodily functions erupted loudly against my will, interrupting the dealership's most enterprising saleswoman midsentence as a fetid smell akin to what I imagine a genocide reeks like filled the spacious area, floor to ceiling, within seconds. I stood there in shock, as did Gina. We maintained an uncomfortable mutual stare for a moment before my feet automatically began backing away; unconsciously desperate to immediately escape the nightmare on my stunned behalf.
Others began to correlate the stench with my shuffling presence and two or three pointed in my direction, outing my soiled situation to their small groups of co-workers.
"Don't look at me!" I yelled as involuntarily as I'd emptied my bowels as I crossed the threshold back into the lot, my shrill echo boomed and everyone who hadn't previously noticed my embarrassment did then at that exact moment. My mind was racing, while also simultaneously completely blank in an odd mix of trauma, shame, panic and despair. My reputation, tarnished in the blink of an eye like my work slacks.
I got to my still open and blinking Porsche, removed the bottom half of my attire and dumped it all right there beside me on the ground, socks included. They were someone else's problem now. With a quick wipe using the discarded clothing I hopped back inside and sped away from the scene. The smell haunting me the whole way like the memory of that day will haunt my every waking moment forever.
An hour's drive home later and I was sitting outside my house afraid to go inside. I didn't tell my wife what happened to me when she greeted me at the front door, balls out, instead storming upstairs to hide in the shower, opting for the inevitable rumor mill to do the job instead. We never spoke of it, ever. I never spoke about much of anything after that…
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2023.03.25 11:07 internship-at-top Few hacks to crack a paid internship online!
| || |https://preview.redd.it/sjlf1duf0vpa1.png?width=1200&format=png&auto=webp&s=87515597736eecdf2d9fed5faf88e5546dc27c7d submitted by internship-at-top to u/internship-at-top [link] [comments]
The pandemic, recession, global heat waves, amidst all this chaos, somehow our world still keeps moving. People are on the move looking for work and opportunities. Added to that the internet has revolutionised the way we work, learn, and even intern. With the rise of online internships
, students now have access to a wider range of opportunities and can gain valuable work experience from anywhere in the world.
However, competition for these work from home internships
is high, and it can be challenging to stand out from the crowd. In this blog post, we will discuss five hacks to crack a paid internship online. 1. Build a Strong Online Presence
In the digital age, your online presence is often the first impression you make on potential employers. Start by creating a professional-looking LinkedIn profile and include relevant information such as your education, work experience, and skills. Join relevant groups and connect with professionals in your field of interest. Also, make sure that your other social media profiles are up to date and free of any unprofessional content. 2. Network, network, network
Networking is crucial when it comes to finding a paid internship. Joining relevant online communities, attending virtual events and workshops, and reaching out to professionals in your field can help you gain valuable connections and increase your chances of finding a paid internship.
Make sure to tailor your communication to each person you reach out to, and don't be afraid to ask for advice or recommendations. 3. Develop new skills
In addition to having relevant skills and experience, companies are also looking for interns who are willing to learn and develop new skills. Consider taking online courses certifications
from Unschool to demonstrate your willingness to learn and improve in your field or related areas. This can also help you stand out from other applicants who may not have the same level of training or knowledge. 4. Showcase Your Skills Through a Portfolio
Creating a portfolio that showcases your skills and projects can help you stand out from other candidates. Include examples of your work, such as writing samples, design projects, or code snippets. Make sure that your portfolio is well-organized and easy to navigate, and highlight your best work. Moreover, you can develop your skills from work from home internship which can benefit you in future. 5. Follow up
After submitting your application for a paid internship
, it's important to follow up with the company to show your interest and enthusiasm. This can be as simple as sending a thank-you email or following up on the status of your application. This will demonstrate your professionalism and help you stand out from other applicants who may not have followed up.
In conclusion, landing an online paid internship program
requires effort, dedication, and persistence. With Ulead, your dream internship is only a few steps away!! Also, don’t forget to network, customize your application, develop new skills, create a strong online presence, and follow up, so you can increase your chances of landing the perfect paid internship. Good luck!. Apply today!!.
2023.03.25 11:07 shoshfist Remote Control's Bluetooth Keeps Disconnecting When TV Is Off (A95K)
Whenever I turn on my A95K after a few hours of being powered off, I notice an input lag using the remote control, then I see that the Bluetooth connection to the remote control is lost and I have to pair it again.
Furthermore, when my TV is turned off, it goes completely offline, so that you cannot cast to it without powering it on first. I can also see on the Google Home app that the TV is offline. The TV is connected to Wi-Fi.
Does anybody else have these issues? Are they software-related? Is there a fix or should I wait for an update?
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to sony [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 11:06 amelia__1__ I'm really struggling with feeling safe to experiment at home even though my family aren't transphobic, and I don't know what to do because that sounds so ridiculous
I'm a 20-year-old trans girl living in Australia. Over the past few months I've made leaps and bounds in coming to terms with being trans, and engaging with queer clubs at uni, making new supportive friends, etc. I feel really ready to transition and I really want to start experimenting with what I wear, makeup, etc. (First at home, then with supportive friends / in queer spaces). In fact I'm gonna be starting HRT within a few weeks!!!
The issue is, I still live at home with my parents, brother, and sister because I'm studying uni full time. Now I'm only out to my mum so far, and she's supportive of it. My dad doesn't know the first thing about trans people, but he's highly unlikely to be actually transphobic, probably just really confused and uninformed. The same goes for my sister - she'll probably be fine with it. My brother is kinda homophobic but my parents will make sure he doesn't actually say anything.
My dysphoria is so bad now that transitioning ASAP isn't a choice, but the idea of transitioning while living at home fills me with dread. That feels really stupid, because there are people out there with legitimately and violently transphobic households who have situations a million times worse than me - my situation is really pretty good.
There are a few reasons I find the idea of living at home while transitioning so hard. Firstly, like I said earlier I really want to start experimenting with my gender. I'm not comfortable or ready to present female in public (or really, in front of anyone else) yet but if I lived out of home I'd be putting on makeup, painting nails, wearing female clothes every night once I got home from uni. At home, I can't do that because I'm not out to my dad, brother, or sister - and even if I was out to them, I get a huge amount of anxiety from being perceived. Because I obviously wouldn't actually pass I'd be terrified of the way they perceive me. Obviously that's all in my head but it feels very very very real. It's something I'll need to work through, but working through it feels impossible while I'm in the midst of it. What I really need is my own space where I won't be perceived, where I can just exist, and right now I don't have that (my room is small and anyone could walk in whenever, and even if I had a lock I'd need to leave to go to the bathroom or use the kitchen or whatever).
The other thing is, transitioning is always hard on the family, and I totally understand that, but witnessing that firsthand with no "escape" from it per se is something I'm not sure I'll be able to handle properly amongst all the other stress of transitioning. The only spaces I'm ever in are uni (which is queer accepting but I'm not remotely ready to present female at uni), tutoring (which I'm going to have to boymode in all year to keep my clients), and occasionally at a friend's house or queer bar which is a "safe space" - but in all of those spaces I'm being perceived, I don't have a space to be alone.
I just get really anxious about being perceived and I'm also somewhat autistic and really really need alone time - which I basically never get. I get alone time in the sense that I'm in my room a lot but I never can feel alone at a psychological level because I know I'll always run into family members going to the kitchen or bathroom or whenever. I just feel so bad about this because I love my family, I have nothing against any of them and none of them would probably even say or think anything bad or hateful about me but I'm just so fucked up in the head and anxious and I just desperately want to be alone most of the time because what I need is room to experiment and work out what I want to do with myself.
Finally, I also some have past trauma with my brother having really severe anger issues when he was younger, and even though it's all past and I've forgiven everyone I can still feel the traces of it when I live at home, back when it was a thing I never felt safe outside of my room and the ghost of that feeling is still there a lot of the time, even though it's all in the past and I don't hold it against anyone. But it really doesn't mix well with all the trans stuff now and I just really need a space where I do feel 100% safe and comfortable and alone, because as much as I hate it and feel bad about it I really do struggle to feel comfortable or let my guard down when I'm at home around family (or really, anywhere, cause it's not like being out in public is any better, although it is different)
So I've been considering moving out, but I don't even know how I could do that, because tutoring is too unstable of a job and I'm doing uni. Even if I dropped to part-time uni, where would I work? I'd either have to boymode somewhere, and I don't know how well that would work because I honestly think I might pass pretty well after I'm on HRT for a bit and had laser. But either way, I don't have my degree, and I'm not really sure where I'd work to make enough money to rent a place of my own especially with skyrocketing rent prices where I live. I could live with flatmates but then that brings back the whole issue of being perceived - it's just so god damn difficult that my weird autistic messed up mind can't handle the idea of presenting female in front of other people before I get used to it by myself.
This is all such a first world problem, people have it so much worse than me, but I just don't know what to do. At a subconscious, but very real, psychological level, I just can't relax or feel safe when I'm at home. I've lived out of home before but that was before I felt ready to experiment. Now that I am ready to and really want/need to try out presenting female (even if just to alleviate my dysphoria after being at uni all day) I can't do it, even though my family would probably be fine and even supportive, I just can't move past traces of past trauma and all the distance I've put up psychologically from having to present male for so long, and I just don't want to be exposed 24/7 to their process of accepting me and coming to terms with me being trans (even though I 100% respect that because I had to go through that exact same process).
So yeah I don't fucking know what to do and it's really getting me down because I am starting HRT soon, but until I can bring myself to come out to my brother and sister I can't even present female at home, and I'm sure not going to be ready to present female anywhere else until I do at home. I've thought about asking some of my queer friends if I can try stuff on at their places and I'm sure they'd be more than fine with that but I'm really just not ready to be presenting female in front of anyone else before I can try it myself. Ugh.
This post ended up way longer than I expected so I doubt anyone will read it but if anyone does, is there any advice you think might help? I have no close trans friends irl who I can talk about this stuff with so I kinda just don't know what to do in general
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2023.03.25 11:05 langma123 Online Spoken English Classes for Adults
Online spoken English classes for adults
have become increasingly popular in recent years. With the rise of globalization and the importance of English as a global language, more and more people are seeking to improve their English communication skills. Online spoken English classes provide an accessible and convenient way for adults to learn and practice English from the comfort of their own homes. One of the main advantages of online spoken English classes is their flexibility. Unlike traditional classroom-based courses, online classes can be scheduled to fit around the student’s existing commitments, such as work or family responsibilities. This means that students can learn at their own pace and on their own schedule, without having to sacrifice other important activities.
Another advantage of online spoken English classes is that they can be tailored to the individual needs of each student. Many online English schools offer personalized assessments to determine a student’s proficiency level and to identify areas that need improvement. This allows the teacher to create a customized curriculum for each student, focusing on the specific skills and areas of English that the student needs to work on. In addition, online spoken English classes are often more affordable than traditional classroom-based courses. This is because online schools do not have the same overhead costs as brick-and-mortar schools, such as rent and utilities. As a result, online schools are able to offer their classes at a lower price point, making them accessible to a wider range of students.
Online spoken English classes also offer a more comfortable learning environment for many students. For example, some students may feel self-conscious or nervous about speaking English in front of others in a traditional classroom setting. Online classes allow students to practice speaking and listening skills in a more private and relaxed environment, which can help to build confidence and improve their overall fluency. One potential downside of online spoken English classes is the lack of face-to-face interaction with a teacher. While online classes may include video conferencing or other virtual communication tools, some students may prefer the in-person interaction of a traditional classroom setting. However, many online English schools have experienced and qualified teachers who are able to provide personalized feedback and support to students through virtual channels.
When choosing an online spoken English class, it is important to research and compare different schools and programs to find the best fit for your individual needs. Some key factors to consider include the qualifications and experience of the teachers, the course curriculum and structure, and the cost and scheduling options. It may also be helpful to read reviews and testimonials from other students to get a better sense of the quality and effectiveness of a particular program. In conclusion, online spoken English classes offer a convenient, flexible, and affordable way for adults to improve their English communication skills. With personalized assessments, tailored curriculums, and experienced teachers, online classes can provide a comfortable and effective learning environment for students of all proficiency levels. While there may be some drawbacks to online learning, the benefits of convenience, customization, and affordability make online spoken English classes a valuable option for many adults. Langma School of Languages is one of the best foreign language institutes in Delhi, India. We offer more than 50
foreign languages courses and classes online and offline in Delhi, India and other countries in the world. Some of them are
English language classes, German language speaking course, Japanese language course, Spanish language classes, Spoken Sanskrit classes, Russian language coaching and so on.
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2023.03.25 11:05 Intrepid-Inspector80 Need advice in long-ish distance relationship (25M) + (22F)
Me (25M) and my GF (22F) have been officially together for just over a year now but started seeing each other around 18 months ago and are currently having some issues with new distance in the relationship.
When we first met she lived 40 minutes away, which at the time didnt feel so bad. We took things slow (mostly on my terms) but ended up fostering a committed relationship. She began to look to move closer to me, viewed several places to rent and even got a job near me. Though i currently live with my parents she spent most days with me and stayed most nights while she was looking somewhere.
The first half of last year was great, we went away together a lot made a tonne of memories in a short time and built a genuinely amazing relationship. My relationship before her was 8 years long, and ive felt so much more love in this newer one. Im basically trying to say that things were very good, everything was so easy and it just felt like we were made to be a team.
Summer came around and she ended up landing her dream job opportunity of becoming a tattoo artist (apprentice position). The studio was 50 minutes away, but it didnt seem so bad i was just thrilled for her because these positions are famously hard to get. A couple months later she ended up getting a place over there. On a good day it's 50 mins away, on a bad more like 70.
Initially she was working 3 days and living off of savings as well as the small amount she earned at the time. So we still had time to make the trips and stay with eachother for a few nights at a time. However she now works a full 5 days, but tattoo apprenticeships arent particularly lucrative so shes even having to now look for part time work to fit around it.
Im freelance, which is both a blessing and a curse, it means i can be flexible with my time and work from home at her place so we can see eachother on evenings. It also means that my work can be super sporadic and lead to unfortunate timings where we may not see eachother for over a week or more.
But things have been particularly tough recently. We had a bit of a rough patch before Christmas where she didnt feel i was making enough effort and felt that i wasnt committed to our future (she was right to a degree in that i hadnt been doing much to show my intent and put that effort in) then she ended up kissing another guy on a random night out. She owned up to it after it had happened and we took some time off, i made the decision to let her back and try to rebuild some trust. Though many people might think thats not a great move i was happy with my decision and things actually got way way better, we had some conversations and loads of time together over Christmas which was a blessing. Our relationship genuinely got a second lease of life after that.
However the pain from that still festered and i still struggled to fully trust her, the past couple of months ive been quite anxious and maybe sometimes overbearing and just feeling suspicious which has definitely had an effect on her too.
The last month in particular has been difficult as shes had to do things on her usual days off and work has become more busy for me, typically on her days off too. So weve been trying to block out time together but its proven difficult.
This past week ive noticed that shes been a little off, i managed to stay at hers last night and decided to semi address the situation. I was upset and didnt put on my best performance (tears etc) but basically she said she feels like our relationship and her life where she currently lives are two separate things, like shes living 2 lives almost. She said that she feels like she cant establish a social life where she lives or fully settle because of our relationship. Shes always been quite needy (i dont mean that in a negative way) in the sense that she likes to have me around all the time, she basically said that all of the issues that have come with the distance are not what she wants in a relationship. Both of our love languages are physical touch and quality time which arent helped by distance.
The further issue is that we dont have an end goal/distance closer in sight. I will be moving out of my parents house this summer to a city that is even further away (probably 90 minutes total), she considered moving to the city too but says she doesnt want to make the move if im the only reason (which is fair enough i understand that perspective fully). I had tried to push her to move and look for an apprenticeship in that city but she seems to think it will be impossible as theyre super hard to get.
During our conversation last night she said she had kind of made the decision to settle there because it was easier than moving again. We didnt really come to any sort of conclusion, as far as i know we are still together but it feels like its all hanging in the balance.
I want to make this work, i believe we have a good relationship and the only reason for it to end would be 50 minutes of driving, which feels like a waste to me. I considered taking more time off to wrap our heads around the issue but I'm anxious that more space isnt the solution. Im concerned that she will now think im being too needy and anxious as ive made it very clear i dont want things to end.
Any advice would be so appreciated, even just a new perspective!
TLDR: GF (22F) of just over a year recently moved 50 minutes away for work. We have a very good relationship (barre one rough patch where she kissed someone else as our relationship took a hefty dip). Things have been busy and we've struggled to see eachother more than once a week recently. I will be moving further away (90 mins) in summer and we dont have an end goal of distance closer in sight. Im freelance so sometimes can work at her place and see eachother on evenings, she had time to look to move to the city that im moving to but has decided to settle where she is as she doesnt want to make the move just because i am.
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2023.03.25 11:03 anegelic AITA by adopting a cat against my mom's will?
I have one year left of school and I'm an 18 year old female. I still live with my parents but I'm planning to move out with my boyfriend once I graduate but I'm paying rent for my room. We had a cat for 15 years but we had to put him down due to health complications. It's been a few months and I knew I wanted to adopt a cat once I have my own apartment, but 2 days ago I saw a post on Facebook about 4 little ginger kittens and I was absolutely in love. I contacted the local shelter and I told them I'd like to adopt one specific one and my friends agreed to drive me to get him. I DID NOT tell this to my mom. She has expressed her opinion about not wanting any more pets at her old age, she's over 50, and that she doesn't want to take care of any pets anymore. I mentioned a couple of times that I'd like to get a cat and that all of it's expenses would go onto me, but she is completely against this idea and says eventually its care would fall onto her and that she'd have to pay for vet ect. We have an 8 year old dog and the only people who care for her is my dad and me. She doesn't even walk the dog at all so I don't understand why she thinks all the care would fall onto her. The thing is, she kitten has all of it's vaccines and he's already castrated. Me and my boyfriend will pay for everything he needs because we have jobs, but my mom STILL is very against this and she said if I brought a cat home she would throw him out. I was going to not tell her about getting a cat and just bring him in after adopting him because I knew she'd soften up to him just like she softened up to our dog, but now I'm scared to in case she would be that crul. Plus the cat would only stay here for a year until I move out. What should I do? Should I just get the cat? I'm supposed to drive out tomorrow at 8am to pick him up or should I break mine and my boyfriend's heart and not take him and adopt once we move out. It's hard because the one I found was the perfect cat. Any advice? This all might just honestly sound stupid...
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2023.03.25 11:02 Nurgus Blueprint upgrades
When I alter a blueprint file, Home Assistant doesn't seem to notice any changes. It only notices deletes and renames.
Even deleting and re-adding the file doesn't help, it's as if the old file is cached somewhere. I have to use a new filename every time I change the file.
Is this normal? Is it actually possible to alter blueprints which are in use for active automations?
I'm running in a container at the mo with the blueprints directory exposed.
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to homeassistant [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 11:01 sdfghdrert TAB Australia Cup 2023 Live Stream Reddit?
| || | submitted by sdfghdrert to UFC4 [link] [comments]
Looking for early info on this year’s Australian Cup? The tipsters at Neds have put together
everything you need to know before this year’s race.
Run over 2,000 meters each March at Flemington Racecourse, the Australian Cup is a Group 1
classic run and won since 1863. https://i.redd.it/f4wpod3jyupa1.gif Live Here: https://liveesports.online/australian-cup/
It was previously held on ‘Super Saturday’ at headquarters alongside the Group 1 Newmarket
Handicap (1200m) but was moved to its own feature race meeting later in the month ahead of
the 2023 edition.
The Group 2 Peter Young Stakes (1800m) held earlier during the Melbourne Autumn Racing
Carnival is the key lead-up into the Australian Cup and Fiorente (2014) was the last galloper to
complete the double.
The weight-for-age feature currently offers $3 million in prize money after having its stakes
increased for 2023, and many turf greats have taken out the event including in recent times
Northerly (2001, 2003) and current race record holder Makybe Diva (2005) best known for her
historic Melbourne Cup three-peat.
The late, great ‘Cups’ King’ Bart Cummings famously won the Australian Cup on 13 occasions
with his last success being in 2008 with Sirmione.
In 2022 Duais won the Australian Cup before a next-up victory in Sydney’s Group 1 Tancred
Stakes (2400m), while the form was also franked by the runner-up Think It Over who won the
Group 1 Queen Elizabeth Stakes (2000m) at Randwick during April’s The Championships.
TAB Australian Cup Day 2023 Flemington
Saturday 25 March 2023
On its new home on the last Saturday in March TAB Australian Cup Day will be a pivotal day on
the racing calendar and a fitting finale to the Flemington Racing Spectacular.
Another feature race day and a spectacular finale
On its new home on the last Saturday in March TAB Australian Cup Day will be a pivotal day on
the racing calendar and a fitting finale to the Flemington Racing Spectacular.
The $3 million Group 1 TAB Australian Cup (2000m) counts many of the greats of the Australian
turf on its honour roll - legends such as Dulcify Bonecrusher Vo Rogue Better Loosen Up Let's
Elope Saintly Octagonal Northerly Lonhro Makybe Diva and Zipping. Last year's edition was
taken out by Duais.
Also featuring is the Listed Roy Higgins (2600m) with a new prizemoney purse of $500000 and
an eagerly sought-after Golden Ticket for the winner into the 2023 Lexus Melbourne Cup.
And of course the last Saturday in March presents the last chance to enjoy the thrills and tastes
of the Flemington Fareground! Look out for the $5 fries and $5 large beef pies available from
food outlets across the course.
Kick on after the last race as Paris Lawrence will be on the decks to keep the party going for our
'Front Lawn Party Hour'.
Group 1 TAB Australian Cup (2000m)
Members Enclosure Daily Ticket
2023.03.25 11:01 GoodKing0 There are RPF fangirls of Venom in the Marvel Universe
2023.03.25 11:00 AutoModerator Daily r/LawnCare No Stupid Questions Thread
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Check out the sidebar if you're interested in more information on plant hardiness zones, identifying problems, weed control, fertilizer, establishing grass, and organic methods. Also, you may contact your local Cooperative Extension Service for local info. How to Get the Most out of Your Post:
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Daily No Stupid Questions Thread • Mowsday Monday • Treatment Tuesday • Weed ID Wednesday • That Didn't Go Well Thursday • Finally Friday: Weekend Lawn Plans • Soil Saturday • Lawn of the Month • Monthly Mower Megathread • Monthly Professionals Podium • Tri-Annual Thatch Thread • Quarterly Seed & Sod Megathread
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2023.03.25 11:00 Tiredworker27 The Capitalists and Plutocrats want unregulated large scale immigration - thats why you hear the 24/7 propaganda and why nobody is doing anything to stop it
Normally people dont really think about this and babble how great large scale immigration is because it increases the number of consumers thus leading to more production and consumption.
Or something about "we need immigrants because who is going to do all the shit jobs".
Well first: Through the sheer numbers large scale immigration drives down wages because it increases the supply of labour at an unnatural rate that outpaces the creation of new jobs.
Second it increases house prices/rent because again the demand of these masses for housing outpaces new construction.
Take Canada for example - wages have been pretty stagnant - housing is unaffordable - but the government wants to import an extra 500 000+ people every year - insanity.
Why do you think the left actively encourages immigration - and the right does nothing against it despite talking big? Because they just love it.
Marx calls this "the reserve army of labour" and notes:
Big industry constantly requires a reserve army of unemployed workers for times of overproduction
. The main purpose of the bourgeois in relation to the worker is, of course, to have the commodity labour as cheaply as possible, which is only possible when the supply of this commodity is as large as possible in relation to the demand for it, i.e., when the overpopulation is the greatest. Overpopulation is therefore in the interest of the bourgeoisie, and it gives the workers good advice which it knows to be impossible to carry out.
To fight Capitalism is to fight large scale and unregulated immigration. Everyone supporting more people during a time of limited pay and resources has just fallen to Capitalist propaganda
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to conspiracy [link] [comments]
2023.03.25 11:00 BM2018Bot Daily Discussion Thread: March 25, 2023
Recent special elections have resulted in Democrats overperforming expectations by a ton! Between Dems getting things done while in power, and the GOP going in an increasingly scary direction, voters can tell which party is looking out for them. Now our job is to get every voter to show up, every election.
Besides our well-known volunteer from home spreadsheet
and weekly volunteer posts, we have some new initiatives to help you support Democrats across the country! Read on and sign up: Introducing Campaign Central: a VoteDem VAN alternative project to help local campaigns organize!
Running for office is a major undertaking, and like any great journey, the first step is often the hardest. Our goal at VoteDem is to lower that barrier by developing a campaigning tool we can freely
offer as a service to Democrats across the country. Campaign Central is a web-based platform that can load voter registration data, organize phone banking, text banking, canvassing, and much more! But to run this project, we need your help. We need volunteers to collect and upload voter registration data once per month (instructions provided), and a Python developer (preferably with experience using Odoo) to help build these tools.
Sign up for a state
Interested in helping us develop the program? Send us a modmail
describing relevant Python experience. Adopt A Candidate is Returning!
Yup - we are continuing our Adopt a Candidate operations. For the moment, we’re largely focusing on upcoming special elections until the primaries for the November elections are finished.
When you adopt a candidate, you commit to volunteering for them at least once a week - in person or from home. Your efforts now could make the difference as these races will likely be very close and have generally lower turnout!
If you’d like to adopt one of these candidates, reply in this thread or send us a modmail
. You can adopt a candidate not on this list if you wish, too. Just let us know!
We’re looking for graphic artists and folks that understand how to run social media!
|Candidate ||District ||Election Day ||Adopted by |
|Joshua Hicks ||Jacksonville, FL At Large 2 ||Mar 21st ||u/Hurrdurraj65 |
|Charles Garrison ||Jacksonville, FL At Large 5 ||Mar 21st ||u/Hurrdurraj65 |
|Alton McGriff Jr. ||Jacksonville, FL City Council 1 ||Mar 21st ||u/Hurrdurraj65 |
|Ramon Day ||Jacksonville, FL City Council 11 ||Mar 21st ||u/Hurrdurraj65 |
|Joyce Morgan ||Duval County, FL Property Appraiser ||Mar 21st ||u/Hurrdurraj65 |
|Tim Cox ||Henderson NV City Council 1 ||April 3rd || |
|Janet Protasiewicz ||WI Supreme Court ||April 4th ||u/Reptorian, u/Lotsagloom, u/Hurrdurraj65, u/table_fireplace, u/SGSTHB, u/Wes_Anderson_Cooper, u/ornery-fizz, u/molybdenum75 |
|Sara Geenen ||Wisconsin Court of Appeals District 1 ||April 4th || |
|Jodi Habush Sinykin ||Wisconsin State Senate District 8 ||April 4th ||u/SaltResearcher4, u/Pipboy3500 |
|Brandon Presley ||MS Governor ||November 7th ||u/ProudPatriot07 |
While we all like to jest that the mod team is able to do anything and everything, we have limitations. We are currently looking for individuals with knowledge and skill in creating Graphic Art as a way to further the community's image. Our main priority would be aiding in creating graphics akin to the following design that we’ve used for AMA guests
We are also looking for someone that is more knowledgeable in how to properly create a social media following/interact in the social media spaces to effectively operate them. The mod team is not particularly knowledgeable, nor do we have the time to properly utilize those tools.
If you are interested in volunteering forhelping with either position, please send us a modmail
and we will continue the conversation from that point. Note: neither of these positions are paid and would be done on a purely volunteer role.
Let’s make sure that the GOP knows the true power of grassroots action!
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2023.03.25 10:59 xbdnsnd Part 2
When he was 15, I fell madly in love with a guy. We soon moved into his place, and that required Saracen’s cat being re-homed to one of my friends, due to my bf being allergic
He wasn’t rich by any means, but he made six figures, which to us was a fortune, and this better life was a huge reason I got Saracen to fold on his cat ordeal
Between falling into this new lifestyle, and no longer having his cat to motivate him, this is where Saracen started switching up. He quit his animal rescue stuff and spent his time constantly at the library researching finance and looking for ways to get rich
Due to Saracen’s social awkwardness, my bf took this as disrespect, and gradually grew to hate him until he was kicking down his door everyday and screaming at him to do work outdoors. Saracen would usually run away to the library, which never helped the situation
Then I found out I was pregnant. After realizing I could no longer leave him, my bf kicked Saracen out. Thank god my parents ended up taking him in. He also got his cat back
Saracen was smart enough to realize what his undoing was, and practiced speaking everyday afterwards to boost his charisma and kick his speech problems. It worked
He realized and appreciated what his grandparents were doing for him, and was always very respectful to them. He always respected me in front of them as well because he didn’t want them viewing him in a bad light while he was still receiving free room and board from them (I guess you could say he learned from last time)
But behind closed doors, he was an absolute monster. He would verbally abuse me, make physical threats, and say very inappropriate stuff to me regarding my relationship that would’ve gotten me slapped as a kid. Although despite my many mistakes, even I was smart enough to not do that to a raging, psychotic teen boy while I was carrying a child
One odd quirk of his during this time is the fact that he was embarrassed to be seen with me when pregnant. He said he would not have people believing he was some old cow’s teen baby daddy
I did try talking to my parents about all this, but they only ever took Saracen’s side. After all, he was the great, all-American, overachieving grandson who overcame all this adversity, meanwhile I was just the pregnant family fuck up. And then of course I had to deal with the fallout from Saracen himself when he found out I was “Tattling on him to my mommy at 35 years old like the good little bitch I am”
After my second son was born, let’s call him Wisterion, Saracen full on stopped spending time with me all together, as he didn’t want a crying baby ruining everything. He also didn’t want to be around me while I pumped my breasts
This was accompanied by the fact that he turned 16 shortly after. I did buy him a car, and he no longer had any legal labor restrictions. So, he got a job and worked 30 years a week for the rest of his time in HS
Eventually, Saracen finally started coming around. His cat was getting old/sick by this point, and despite Saracen making a very good amount of his own money by this point, I insisted on covering everything associated with him, including the vet bills
Between that and buying his car, I think Saracen finally realized that I was trying my best to make things right. It also helped that Wisterion was older by that point
Despite all this, Saracen still moved as far away as he could immediately after turning 18. He never spent any of his money, so he had more than enough to do this and live comfortably while he worked on what he wanted to work on
I’m not going to get into specifics, as I don’t want any chance of his identity getting revealed, but needless to say he ended up succeeding beyond anyone’s wildest dreams
This may sound like a good ending, and I suppose it’s still not the worst, but Saracen is still not a good person
He has multiple children with multiple women, and he just throws checks at them and calls it a day. I guess that’s more than his father can say. I never got a dime of child support unless his father was caught by the state
Saracen has also told me stories of the things he has done to reach this magnitude of success, and it’s not good
And if you’re wondering how Wisterion’s childhood went, not bad. Turns out my bf only believes in abuse when the kid isn’t biologically his
Now that I’ve given you the infinite amount of context required, I suppose it’s time to get to the main point
Wisterion was diagnosed with osteosarcoma two years ago, and due to the intensive chemo/radiation, a bone marrow transplant was needed. Saracen was the only prospect, as despite only being half, he was still his only sibling
Saracen said he’d do it if my bf literally got on his knees and begged for forgiveness for his actions. This proposal caused a LOT of turbulence in our relationship, but eventually he agreed.
During the ordeal, Saracen brought one of his friends to witness the occasion, which did make me suspicious. But, I had nothing to lose. Afterwards, Saracen simply asked if this pitiful display would’ve been enough for my bf. Sure enough, my bf went lunging and got double-teamed
Wisterion recently succumbed, obviously he was the only thing keeping this “relationship” alive. Here I am with no children and no place to go. Idek what to say
I can’t be mad at Saracen for making a choice about his own body. I suppose the going back on his word part wasn’t good, but what can you expect from someone like him? I wish I could say he was raised better, but I wouldn’t be kidding anyone
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2023.03.25 10:59 GanbaruSunshine Follow-Up to my Type Confusion and Socionics Study
Hello! I recently made a post on the main Socionics reddit regarding my confusing between IEE and EIE. https://www.reddit.com/Socionics/comments/11xagi1/studying_socionics_confused_between_eie_and_iee/
I learned a lot from that thread and my conversations with others, and feel like I have a better grasp on the system. In order to not fill up the Socionics reddit with more type confusion stuff, I wanted to follow-up on here to see if someone would help me and continue probing me for questions/info about my type! I have a hard time seeing myself as myself without direct feedback from others, so I've hit a snag in terms of my thinking and research.
I attached parts of the questionnaire as well below, I tried to keep the answers brief since there's so many. ##Section 1 **1. How do you work? Why do people go to work? Are there any parameters that determine whether you can do work or not? What are they?*\
I work in bursts, I have a hard time doing work unless its meaningful to me or benefits others in a way I can see. I think a lot of people go to work just to survive, not necessarily because they enjoy it. That's a system issue which I could go into, but for the sake of this questionnaire, I won't. I think the world would be better if people worked on what they were passionate about and enjoyed and could make a comfortable salary. When I don't agree with the morals/ethics of the work I'm doing, feel it is menial or detrimental to society, I tend to not want to work. Especially if I'm being ordered around. I usually like making my own decisions and being the leader. I'm indecisive, but can be decisive when it comes to figuring out what's best for others. I have a hard time working for myself. I have so many ideas that I'd like to launch and people have told me I have so much potential...but its hard for me to activate it and get going, because I just don't see myself as being that valuable as the wellbeing of others. **2. How do you determine the quality of work? How do you determine the quality of a purchase? Do you pay any attention to it?*\
Quality of work depends on the result. If the result is good, I feel it's okay even if the way it was completed was not "following procedure." Quality of purchase I usually determine by doing research on product and what others are saying. I usually like to get the best product I can even if its something small/not used often. I play a lot of attention to that, also along to how the product makes me feel. **3. There is a professional next to you. How do you know they are a professional? How do you evaluate their skill?*\
Usually based on their status or how other people perceive them. I can be a bit indifferent to a professional, I see people as pretty much equal regardless of their social status/standing. Usually I think there's too much hype around them and sometimes I won't really agree with societies perception if my understanding/experience differs. **4. If you struggle to do something, how do you fix that? Do you know if your performance is better or worse than others?*\
Usually I research or ask others. A lot of times I get stuck on my own in tasks related to myself. Like trying to understand myself. Usually once I talk to someone else I can get a better understanding of what I'm doing wrong and everything clicks. I used to play games competitively and would constantly make the same errors, unable to realizing them myself. Someone would point it out and change my thinking/approach and then I would be able to improve myself as if a weight was lifted. Usually I compare my performance to my past self, I'm most in competition with myself but I also compete against others in private. I want to outdo others, but I'm not cutthroat about it. **5. How do you measure the success of a job? What standard do you use? Do you pay attention to it? When should you deviate from this standard?*\
This is kind of hard for me to answer, I don't focus on the things in this section that much. Usually success for me means not failing or reaching the standard. I seem to prioritize avoiding failure more-so than reaching for success. Failure as in running out of town, losing out, making a fatal error...etc. **Meta-analysis:*\
This whole section is hard to answer, I don't really focus on it. Or well I only do when the need arises, it feels like I need to switch myself over to think about these things, but I'd much rather be invested in other more positive things and not think too much about this. It feels very business like, which I am able to do, but I do these things to achieve the goal of positive change in the world or helping others, reaching my vision.
##Section 2 **1. What is a whole? Can you identify its parts? Are the parts equivalent to the whole?*\
I don't really know??? I think something is whole when it's fully fulfilled? I can identify the parts perhaps, but I don't know if they're equivalent? They're only equivalent if the whole is meaningful as well? Hard for me to answer this one. **2. What does "logical" mean? What is your understanding? Do you think that it correlates with the common view? How do you know you are being logical?*\
Logical to me is about consistency. I don't know if I'm logical or not, but I strive to be when it is needed. I don't really know how to tell, but perhaps I would say I'm being logical if I'm being consistent in my thoughts/methods. To follow-up, I think I can change myself to be almost anything depending on what is needed, but not for long. I think a lot of people feel they are more logical than they really are, especially people who try to remove emotions from the nature of things all together. **3. What is hierarchy? Give examples of hierarchies. Do you need to follow it? Why or why not? Explain how hierarchy is used in a system you are familiar with.*\
Basically things that have status over others. I play/love video games so one of my first thoughts are tier lists, they place certain characters in higher positions due to being innately stronger by whatever criteria is relevant to the game. I never really agreed with this because how can we say something is ALWAYS better than the other? For instance, a person can get really good at a specific characteplaystyle and dominate everyone else. I feel when people focus too much on following these things it becomes dogmatic and takes the fun out of things. Even if you want to win, what is the point if you're not doing it your own way? If you're always following what everyone else is doing, what is the point in anything because its no longer your life. **4. What is classification? How does classification work? Why is it needed and where is it applied? Give examples.*\
Assigning something to a group or discovering what group it belongs to. Like uncovering the nature of an animal by identifying what group it belongs to scientifically. It can be useful to easily identify similarities between different things or create a system that allows you to draw conclusions without extra work. **5. Are your ideas consistent? How do you know they are consistent? How do you spot inconsistency in others' ideas?*\
I would think that they aren't consistent. I don't think it matters though if they are consistent as long as the meaning behind them is consistent. For instance I can change the way I view things pretty easily (and myself) so I wouldn't say I'm a consistent person internally. Outside I can appear as such but its more of a survival based trait less of a natural one. I don't really look to critique inconsistency in others so it's not natural to me. Instead, I like to find certain errors and help a person improve them. Actually the more I think of it, it might be looking for inconsistency. I was always good at proofreading others work, not just for punctuation/grammar, but to see if their ideas make sense in the grand scheme of things. It's unconscious for me to do this, I don't put much thought into it and comes into my head naturally when I see something that feels "incorrect."
An example is when someone is drawing a conclusion and it feels like it's somewhat right, but goes to the state of being extreme. Maybe someone had a bad run-in with a certain gender or culture and they assume all of them are are the same...this doesn't feel right because even though one experience was that way, it's not correct/consistent to assume that all other experiences will be the same. Like correlation does not equal causation? **Meta-analysis:*\
This section felt a bit harder AT FIRST, but when I thought about it more I had an easier time answering than the first one. Again, I don't really focus on these things consciously, but they do annoy me when people can be a little dogmatic about it. I guess this whole section to me boils down to "right vs wrong" and "correct vs incorrect" I feel like something can be the correct approach even if its not moral/emotional/rational, but then something else kicks in and decides not to act on it if it doesn't meat that criteria.
--- ##Section 3 **1. Can you press people? What methods do you use? How does it happen?*\
Not really...I kind of struggle with this. Sometimes I get frustrated, because it seems that people always are standing in my way. Usually its when I'm trying to do something for the betterment of others, they like to hinder me from reaching that goal. I relate to maneuvering around them, I don't really run people over. Or I like outperform them passively...becoming more successful, working hard, becoming a bit more stubborn. **2. How do you get what you want? What do you do if you have to work to get what you want?*\
Usually getting what I want isn't something I'm concerned with, usually it's what others want that's more important. I usually don't mind doing the hard work if its for what others want...but for what I want it's kind of hard to put in the work. **3. How do you deal with opposition? What methods do you use to defend your interests?*\
I can become pretty stubborn. I'm not a person to rely on anger and blow up on people, I'm more likely to try to reason. But I feel like a lot of people can't be reasoned with now, so I try to find alternatives around the conflict. **4. When do you think it's ok to occupy someone's space? Do you recognize it?*\
Does this mean physical space or space as an abstract concept? I think physical space is okay (if it means like tendenot combative) when you're emotionally close to the person. I like giving hugs and being near those who I am close to! Otherwise it's probably not okay! I don't think about this at all really. **5. Do others think you are a strong-willed person? Do you think you have a strong will?*\
I think I can appear to be weak on the surface, but inside I can be stronger than I realize. Actually, I'm not sure if others see me as this way. I've always had people tell me that I'm stronger than them, stronger than anyone they've met. This is strength in an abstract way, not physical. Just being able to outlast, persevere, not give up, work harder, learn faster, etc. I relate to the concept of quiet strength. I'm at my strongest and best when I'm fighting for others though! **Meta-analysis:*\
These concepts are kind of weird, because I don't naturally fight others, but I do enjoy certain aggression. I relate to applying pressure or power or drive when other people aren't. For instance, I sometimes like to turn my brain off in games and brute force myself at opponents. I play a lot of support in games, but sometimes I enjoy fighting and don't normally healbot (just passively healing.) Rushing in headfirst is kind of a thrill.
Now that I think about it, I enjoy being active more than passive. I sometimes appear passive because I don't want to cause harm to others, but I enjoy aggression to an extent. More so passion and less of aggression. Being passionate with my emotions, with people I like, touchy-feely, etc! I love being hands on and like work when I can move around. Not physical labor necessarily, but things that keep me moving. I always learned best from actually experiencing something rather than being told. Again it takes a backseat to what other people want though, so I can turn it down if necessary, but it provides a good release of energy for me to be a little loose!
--- ##Section 4 **1. How do you satisfy your physical senses? What examples can you give? What physical experiences are you drawn to?*\
This is kind of embarrassing, but I feel like satisfying them is almost compulsive for me. I'm attracted to sweets and certain delicacies. I like drinks the most. Food I'm more ambivalent about. Drinks as in things like smoothies, boba tea I loveee, teas of all kinds, milkshakes, all kinds of sweet drinks. I don't drink or smoke, but I like the way these make me feel...like emotionally better.
Also can be a little sexual, but I hide this part from my public image. I think sexual desires are pretty natural and people act like they're more taboo. Not necessarily should be flaunted in a trashy way...but people should accept that its natural to be sexually attracted to people, have different tastes, and want to explore them? Like I can understand why people are turned-off from it, but I think it's not good to deny our own natural instincts.
Ok on top of that, I'm drawn to things like good feelings and rush of excitement/energy! I don't even have to be the one doing it, but seeing other people doing something cool, gives me goosebumps. ANOTHER BIG THING IS MUSIC. I love listening to music and it affects me emotionally. Like I get goosebumps easily from songs that touch me to core. Sound is very big for me, I rely on it for everything. Sight would be next or maybe touch.
I love to move around and run. I run pretty much everywhere which can be kind of weird. But I always wondered why people just walk places...? Like its so much more fun to run and you can get to where you're going faster. It's nice to run when its windy too, it creates the perfect atmosphere. I think I'm getting carried away so I'll stop here. **2. How do you find harmony with your environment? How do you build a harmonious environment? What happens if this harmony is disturbed?*\
Hmm, I don't really know. I don't understand somewhat. Harmony with my environment is it like being comfortable? Because I'm comfortable when everyone else around is comfortable. So I usually work to make others comfortable. Sometimes I wish I was on my own, because I feel I would be perfectly comfortable and not have to be oriented to everyone else all the time. I have lived like that before though and was pretty set in inertia/apathy, becoming a slave to my impulses.
For instance in college, I moved out of my family home and stayed in a solo dorm. It was nice having the freedom at first, but it started to reinforce my worse habits. Without external expectations/motivations, I couldn't find a reason to do much of anything. So I ended up not going to classes, not finishing my work, becoming sluggish. The more alone I stayed the more sluggish and worn down I became. Instead of correcting it, I turned to impulsive needs...binging TV and the like. It wasn't until I was forced out of that environment that I turned back to my normal self again.
So sometimes my harmony being disturbed is beneficial to wake me up out of inertia. **3. What does comfort mean to you? How do you create it?*\
Comfort means being in a good state that allows me to be emotionally stable. State as in a mindset, or harboring/staying true to positive emotional feelings. Being comfortable that I won't be attacked for being myself or not necessarily having to bend to the needs of everyone else. I...don't necessarily create it I'm usually forced into it after everything else falls to the wayside.
Outside of that, I sometimes force myself to have this comfort by taking time away from the outside world...while also being connected to the outside world? Like it could be picking up a book I've always wanted to read or manga/anime I've wanted to watch. Playing a game that is solo and just delving into the story. Or thinking about myself and life and what I want out of it. Basically I get the comfort when I focus on my needs for a change, and not everyone elses. OH comfort also comes when I have a guide/goal to follow. I don't like being restricted or forced to do something, but again I can feel aimless when there's no clear path, next steps, or goal for me to work towards. Again I start feeling like things are static and unchanging and it's depressing. So when I have something like that, I feel comfortable and really get in touch with my inner strength. **4. How do you express yourself in your hobbies? How do you engage yourself with those things?*\
OH this is fun! My hobbies are what's really real and true to me! Like I enjoy my hobbies and turn the knowledge I gain from them, experiences, and well the emotional energy into my pursuits in the real world. I'd feel most at home doing work related to my hobbies as long as it's benefiting the world in some way. I don't really have a preference for escaping or running away from problems using them. Sometimes it helps me quiet down my anxiety though.
My hobbies are writing, music, games, anime/manga, and collecting! I enjoy collecting things that are meaningful to me such as figurines...I also like crystals. Usually I represent these things and carry them with me to keep myself grounded and motivated. My wardrobe is based a lot on my hobbies as well.
My passion for these things usually is what takes me into new experiences, I became a leader and met most of my close relationships through my interests. I feel like it's a part I've come to neglect as I've gotten older because it takes a backseat to what I feel I need to do or should do to support others/my family. But its still very important to me.
**5. Tell us how you'd design any room, house or an office. Do you do it yourself, or trust someone else to do it? Why?*\
I usually talk big and say I'd do it myself...then end up asking for help because I'm indecisive! When I was younger I was much more confident just relying on my own perception and likes/dislikes for what I made/designed. For some reason getting older made me less confident in my own ability to judge that, so sometimes I have to seek out others to tell me. I don't always like to do that though, because it loses it's personal meaning for me when I share too much of my interests/ideas with others. It doesn't feel special anymore. **Meta-analysis:*\
This section was really fun to write about! It also makes me feel a bit bad, because I feel like I've neglected myself here and should focus on this more.
--- ##Section 5 **1. Is it acceptable to express emotions in public? Give examples of inappropriate expression of emotions.*\
Yes I think it's acceptable as long as it's not overdone to the point of being phony/attention-seeking. Some things can be kind of trashy, such as excessive displays of affection. I think people are too harsh on others who display emotion out in the open though! Like those who end up crying due to the pressure/stress they face. I've always tried not to show my worse sides to maintain a certain image/stability. The times I've cried in public have been very few and could be counted on one hand. But I don't judge others for doing so. **2. How do you express your emotions? Can you tell how your expressions affect others in a positive or negative way?*\
I don't think I express them that well...at least in real life. I much prefer communicating my emotions via text and find it hard to be fully vulnerable with someone face-to-face. I don't think it's because I'm not emotional though, I relate to most things through emotion. It's just perhaps an insecurity that I gained due to the environment I was in. I've had harden myself to withstand some of worse parts of life and sometimes I feel people will think less of me if I'm fully myself. It slips out online though because its a place I'm much more comfortable with, almost with my family. Again just positive emotions, I tend to hide my negative emotions a bit better. When I was younger, I was described as having a poker face, but I would mostly keep a pleasant expression at most times. **3. Are you able to change your demeanor in order to interact with your environment in a more or less suitable way? How do you determine what is suitable?*\
It's not necessarily to interact with the environment, I feel I naturally become what people see in me. I have trouble typing myself because of this. If someone tells me I am IEE I will be an IEE. If someone says I'm EIE, I will act like that. My image will shift to match the expectations of others in a way. It's not even something I want to do, but I can't turn it off. It's more or less what's suitable, but what would make the person feel better. **4. In what situations do you feel others' feelings? Can you give examples of when you wanted to improve the mood of others?*\
Usually I feel emotion/feelings in regards to everything. Things (even objects) seem to be emotion colored. As in when I look at something in invokes some type of feeling. The same goes for anyone I'm interacting with. So of course I look for the best way to improve someones feelings. I had a struggle with this when I worked in education, I conflicted with other educators because they were focused on the accuracy of the material and doing things from their perspective. I was more focused on the students emotional/mental state and if they were feeling good/healthy. I felt they learned more when someone adequately addressed their needs holistically, as humans. More so than when the focus was on memorization of material. **5. How do others' emotions affect you? How does your internal emotional state correlate or contrast with what you express?*\
They affect me so much. Its almost like I absorb them. When I was younger people would describe me almost like a sponge...but unlike a sponge I wouldn't hold onto the emotions. It would go inside and flow through me, I'd experience it and then it'd flow out. Now I feel like I can hold onto them more when I'm less healthy. Usually my internal state is hard to portray. I try to express myself, but sometimes its hard to get the right words or adequately put the feeling into words. That's why I tend to focus so much more on others. Understanding everyone else is easier...myself is the real mystery. **Meta-analysis:*\
Again this section was easy for me to answer, but it felt a little more serious. Still not bad though! ##Section 6 **1. How can you tell how much emotional space there is between yourself and others? How can you affect this space?*\
Don't really know how to answer this. I don't understand the concept of emotional space. Does this mean like a gap between my feelings and others? I feel like I only fee this when I'm alone then, when I'm with others the feelings merge together. **2. How do you determine how much you like or dislike someone else? How does this affect your relationships?*\
Usually based on how they treat others and what values they hold (also how they act on those values.) I don't really like individuals who are really controlling of others and judge them for their behavior, but honestly I can see a charm in most behavior quirks! Things that are just bad no matter like racism, sexism, homophobia, etc are pretty much non negotiable, especially if they're causing direct harm to others because of those values.
I also don't like when people try to overrun or discount my own values or try to shape my values into something they're not. This has caused me to end a few relationships. Sometimes I end up leaving the relationship because I've noticed how merged I am with my partner and it bothers me. I've lost some really good relationships though...when all that was needed were a few boundaries. So I regret this tendency. **3. How do you move from a distant relationship to a close one? What are the distinguishing characteristics of a close relationship?*\
This happens kind of naturally...but usually I become more engaged with someone who needs help. I make friends very easily, they usually end up seeking me out. I sometimes act as the person to do things for them, take initiative, while they're a bit more passive. I'm not necessarily seeking that role but I naturally meld into it. Most close friends/partners I had were due to me offering to help them and taking an interest in their development.
I mentioned this before but people tend to follow me around? Like physically and literally...look to me to lead them. I sometimes express discomfort on the service but I enjoy it being connected to a person this way and serving as a guide for them. Usually they help me by providing constant support/affection.
Close relationships are usually ones though where I can be my vulnerable self. They don't have as many expectations from me anymore and I can just be what I am. But I don't usually know what I am...so I hope they can help me find this too. **4. How do you know that you are a moral person? Where do you draw your morality from? Do you believe others should share your beliefs on what's moral? Why?*\
Hmm, I don't really know if I am one. I try to do the right thing, and that's pretty much it. There's not really anything else I think about, I only really know what bothers me when it occurs in a real situation. Real or maybe an example of one. I just try to do what's right for others and myself...but I learned being right is hard...sometimes and not clear cut. I don't think people need to share my beliefs, I don't think I'd force them on others. People just need to be respectful of others beliefs...but not if they're just pure hate. I think sometimes we're too tolerant to beliefs that are actually not beliefs just hate. **5. Someone you care about is acting distant to you. How do you know when this attitude is a reflection of your relationship?*\
Don't really know...I think I wouldn't really think of this as a relationship issue but more of something being wrong with the person. Usually when someone is consistently different, I don't have much drive to maintain contact. **Meta-analysis:*\
This sections feels a little abstract, so I can't really answer properly...I don't see things or relationships this way, the whole concept of "relationship" as something separate doesn't really occur to me. I just think of the other person.
--- ##Section 7 **1. How can you tell someone has the potential to be a successful person? What qualities make a successful person and why?*\
I think almost everyone has the potential to change themselves for the better. Success isn't about career, money, status...to me its more about utilizing your strengths and pursuing your passion to be what you want to be. If a person wants to live comfortable then that's their version of success. If another wants to be the president, that's their version. Neither are incorrect as long as they are happy and fulfilled. **2. Where would you start when looking for a new hobby? How do you find new opportunities and how do you choose which would be best?*\
Hmm I don't really go out looking for hobbies. My interests were formed naturally by things I felt a connection to. I have a hard time narrowing down new opportunities to ones that I'd really think are best but searching for them again seems pretty easy, like I don't need to think about it. **3. How do you interpret the following statement: "Ideas don't need to be feasible in order to be worthwhile." Do you agree or disagree, and why?*\
I don't really agree or disagree, because what is feasible? What is an example of an non-feasible idea? One that can't be applied realistically in this current moment? Well how do we know it can't be applied? Like who is the judge? I think almost anything can be possible, we just may not be aware of the method to make it possible yet. So I feel like any idea holds merit and shouldn't be constrained by what's real right now. **4. Describe your thought process when relating the following ideas: swimming, chicken, sciences. Do you think that others would draw the same or different connections?*\
Chickens may swim in lakes sometimes and a scientist might study why chickens are doing so. Perhaps this is unusual behavior for chickens to be swimming so they're taking an look into the cause of this behavior? Or maybe they found a way to enhance the taste of chicken by swimming through a certain body of water? That sounds really stupid but popped in my head! Perhaps someones an actual "chicken" or coward and swimming to get away from their science exam. There's many things I can think of with this haha. I don't think people would think the same, but there's so many things you could link this to.
Another one...there's been research on swimming science...perhaps a new swimming technique that replicates the movements of a chicken. Or maybe some scientists thought it'd be cool to eat chicken while swimming to get newfound inspiration? I could keep going but I'll stop because these sound stupid lol. **5. How would you summarize the qualities that are essential to who you are? What kind of potential in you has yet to be actualized and why?*\
I don't...really know. I mean I do know but also don't. The qualities most important to me are being open-minded and adaptable, being kind, having hope and perseverance. I would hate to become a close-minded, stuck in the mud person. I want to believe in things even if they're silly or unrealistic. Life is magical and I think people should take things less seriously some times. Not everything needs to be proved to have value.
Potential that has yet to be actualized...probably a lot. I feel like I could do a lot of good for this world and others, but I'm holding myself back. Why? I don't really know why, but perhaps I'm scared of being too much or even more so, scared of not being able to realize this. If I try my hardest and still fail, then what is left?
At the same time, I think other's see my potential more than I see it myself. **Meta-analysis:*\
Nothing much to say about this one, seemed pretty straightforward to me!
--- ##Section 8 **1. How do people change? Can you describe how various events change people? Can others see those changes?*\
Nature vs nurture is what comes to mind. Some people are dealt a hand and they may not change much from that. Others are changed by life and their circumstances. I think trauma is a big thing that changes people...also the demands of our world. The world we live in or well our "society" is not built to support everyone. It's not fair and it's not right, so I can see people being forced to change just to survive. This really bothers me. Other people can see those changes, but I think sometimes those who are lucky to fit well with this society tend to look the other way. **2. How do you feel and experience time? Can time be wasted? How?*\
I don't? I can sometimes pinpoint exactly what time it is without a clock. Other times I can be very off. I don't really think time is wasted unless you're doing something you don't like. If its fun its not a waste as its contributing to your wellness of spirit. **3. Is there anything that cannot be described with words? What is it? If so, how can we understand what it is if language does not work?*\
A lot of things...probably the inner nature of humans. For me, I can't express what I truly feel inside. It comes out somewhat, but it's never what I truly feel or imagine. There are other things like invisible bonds we have to others, things you just know without needing to explain. Being bonded or drawn to someone or something for no particular reason...you can't really describe it or what causes it...it just happens.
To understand it...well you can't really? At least not fully. If you could, it'd ruin the nature of it. To me this feels more like something spiritual than a material world issue. **4. How do you anticipate events unfolding? How can you observe such unfoldments in your environment?*\
Usually I can tell the direction something is headed by the patterns that are present. It doesn't need to be a direct correlation, there doesn't need to be proof...sometimes there's just a feeling. Knowing that its right, or at least being very sure. If asked to explain it can't really be explained...but you just know? Also based off past trends and behavior. I look at symbols or experiences I've had before or witnessed in different places (past experiences, representations in media, in other things.) Honestly I enjoy fiction because it teaches so much about why things happen and HOW they happen. So by understanding the cause/effect in fiction, you can identify the same in the real world. **5. In what situations is timing important? How do you know the time is right to act? How do you feel about waiting for the right moment?*\
There's an instinct to just do it. Like the meme, but I've always thought there's a lot of truth in it. I think you'll just know, but the question is less of knowing the time and more of getting yourself to have the courage to take the step. I've missed a lot of things because I knew the time was right...felt it to my core, but I didn't believe in it or myself enough to act on it. Those are my biggest regrets honestly. Of course I was instantly proven right, that I did actually know and I should've acted. But I just couldn't do it.
Waiting for the right moment has merit too! I do that sometimes when the answer isn't clear. Again its just a gut instinct, nothing concrete to base it off. When I feel it, I get a sense inside that I should wait. Almost like some inner voice tells me to wait it out. I'll try to force things sometimes, but it never goes well. It goes back to "just wait." Eventually the right time appears and I realize it was worth waiting for. **Meta-analysis:*\
I liked this section, it feels like a part of myself that was...lost to history, but was brought to light again.
THIS WAS A LOT TO WRITE. SORRY IF THERE ARE ERRORS. IF YOU READ THIS WHOLE THING THANKS SO MUCH FOR TAKING THE TIME TO HELP ME!
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2023.03.25 10:59 Left_Answer1582 GPT4 ~ Rick and Morty Star Wars
Title: Galactic Hearts in Parallel Dimensions
Once upon a time in a dimension not so far away, two unassuming characters, Rick Sanchez and Morty Smith, found themselves thrown into the world of Star Wars. Thanks to one of Rick's crazy inventions, they had accidentally teleported into the galaxy far, far away.
Upon arriving in the Star Wars universe, Rick and Morty were taken aback by the magnificent sight of the iconic twin suns setting on the desert planet Tatooine. Unbeknownst to them, their arrival had not gone unnoticed. A mysterious yet alluring figure watched them from a distance. She was Leia Organa, a princess and leader of the Rebel Alliance, who had been sent on a secret mission to recruit new allies for the upcoming battle against the Empire.
Leia's curiosity was piqued by the strange new visitors, and she approached Rick and Morty with caution. Upon meeting them, she sensed a unique power within Morty, one that hinted at a strong connection to the Force. Intrigued, she invited them to join her cause and fight against the dark side.
As they spent time together, a bond began to form between Morty and Leia. Morty found solace in Leia's wisdom and courage, while Leia was drawn to Morty's innocence and unwavering loyalty. The two became inseparable, and Morty began to discover his latent Force abilities under Leia's guidance.
Meanwhile, Rick, ever the skeptic, was unconvinced by the mystical aspects of the Star Wars universe. He busied himself with reverse-engineering the technology he discovered, hoping to find a way to return home. In the process, he unwittingly attracted the attention of the villainous Darth Vader. Sensing a formidable intellect in Rick, Vader saw the potential to manipulate him into creating a weapon that could bring the galaxy to its knees.
As Morty's powers grew, so did the bond between him and Leia. They fought side by side against the Empire, their love for each other fueling their determination. However, the growing threat of Darth Vader's sinister plan loomed over them.
During a critical battle, Morty and Leia were separated. Leia was captured by the Empire, while Morty, devastated by the loss, retreated with the remaining rebels. As they regrouped, Morty vowed to rescue Leia and stop Darth Vader's plan.
With the help of Luke Skywalker and the Rebel Alliance, Morty hatched a daring plan to infiltrate the Death Star. As they fought their way through the space station, Morty's connection to the Force only grew stronger. In a fateful confrontation, Morty faced off against Darth Vader and discovered the truth about Rick's involvement in the weapon.
Torn between his loyalty to his grandfather and his love for Leia, Morty found the strength to defy Vader, sabotaging the weapon and…
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2023.03.25 10:59 resurrective Chapter 20 – Business, treats and threats
It was way beyond the midday, when Keyaruga woke up from his restless dream. Freia, Setsuna, Eve – all of his companions clung to him in some way or another, so it took a bit of effort not to wake them up.
It didn’t work. I still see them. I still… dream of them.
The hero stood up, but a heavy burden on his soul never allowed him to straighten his stiff shoulders. His vengeance was almost complete. Even if Blade survived, she would have to live with her trauma from her encounter with the healer for the rest of her miserable days.
Josephine too carried deep scars within her, and after what happened in the night, her wounds would never heal. Takemikazuchi didn’t save his daughter, he merely took away the tormented doll from the lad, thus prolonging her suffering.
So what now? My vengeance wasn’t worth it?.. No… It was. Someone had to do something about that bitch, and I even got my divine armament, so I mustn’t think about it too much.
My issues, though… Nobody can help me with that, so sparing myself will only make me weaker. Persevere, Keyaruga. You’re a man, so keep it together and don’t whine.
With that in mind, the man pulled his clothes from the wardrobe, dressed, and even gathered Blade’s tattered clothes. He had a pretty nice idea of who would pay for these rags and scraps. Before that, though…
Eve Reese was the second to rise. She slept in a sitting pose, covering herself with a pair of shiny black wings. Not like she felt cold amidst the summer in her dark nightgown, but the first thing she wished to obtain was her outfit. Conveniently enough, it hanged on the nearest chair.
“Good morning, birdie. I washed your dress, it must be dry now.” The man spoke monotonously, sitting behind a table in the far corner of the room.
“It’s not… morning.” The strained maiden replied, as she changed her clothes. From one side, there was nothing to be embarrassed of, since the healer was never distracted from his deeds. From another… “Do you always keep your guard up? It’s hard, you know? Living like that.” The maiden deadpanned, staring at the lad’s back. She didn’t actually fear this man. Remained cautious – certainly, but at the same time she saw traces of her deceased father in him. Sure, he did cheat on her mom a few times, just like Keyaruga indulged in sexual debaucheries with Freia and Setsuna, but at the same time, both of them never spared themselves from having to protect the ones close to them. Somehow… “I wouldn’t want you to die too.”
“Calm down, Eve, I’m immortal.” He dryly replied to her comment. He didn’t want her to fear for him, and yet the lad couldn’t stop worrying about her. His various phobias were rooted in the same memories of past traumas as his nightmares. Even if he knew, that only the toughest could defeat his girls. “Are you hungry?”
“I think… A little bit, yes.” The black-winged girl spoke, strolling toward the man. She noticed alchemical tools, a few pouches of different roots, plants, some fresh, some dried, some turned into fine powder in the glass mortar. “What’re you doing, Keyaruga?”
“Pondering my orb.” The man responded, half-jokingly, half-serious. The white sphere was placed on a towel on the far left corner of the table. But even so, he barely even looked at that direction.
“It doesn’t look that way.” The queen-to-be noted, taking one of two dozen phials from a small wooden box. The liquid of green and red piqued her curiosity with its peculiar nature. The color didn’t mix, after all, no matter how much the girl shook the vessel. “What is it?”
“Our money. So please put it back from where you took it.” Despite his own words, Keyaruga snatched the bottle from Eve’s hands himself. Put it in back in its place. Everything must be in order, after all. “I’m almost finished. After that, well, a carriage will come and take us to a restaurant.” He elaborated, briefly showing the maiden a sheet of deformed paper. The was an invitation in almost perfect Phasian, written by none other than Karman.
“I see… Hey, Keyaruga, you don’t look so good. Would you, you know, like to speak about something? Like, what’s happening between you and Freia? Why do you… growl in your sleep? Why…”
“That’s enough.” Keyaruga nagged, pouring his miraculous brew into the last vial. “This is something only me and Freia share.” The hero stated, closing the box he bought, while the girls remained asleep. A perk of living in a trustworthy deity’s house – you can always be sure nothing would happen to your treasures. And even that brief outing was stressful enough for the man.
“Ehm… Alright. Would you want to ask me anything?” Eve carefully wondered, making space for the man. Surprisingly enough, not only did he put the box in the bag, he also stuffed it with the same attire he came home in.
“Yes… It’s not a question, though.” The lad declared, turning his crimson eyes toward Eve’s red pupils. Just like his… “Norn, the princess who leads this entire army, and Freia’s sister, will come with us, regardless of whether she wants to or not, even if I have to butcher her entire army on my own and wipe her memories altogether.” The healer admitted, still staring in Eve’s eyes. There, he saw confusion, a little bit of fear, a little bit of stress, a little bit of anger. Clearly, the girl didn’t accept this reality.
“W-why?” The queen-to-be asked, trying to take a step back, only to find herself unable to do so. The twisted grin on the man’s face filled her with dread, as if the hero dropped his mask to reveal his true colors. She didn’t know much about the second princess, but even the rumors she heard painted Norn as an uncaring devil of plagues and murders in a child’s body.
“Because I made a promise, because I can’t leave her in Margurth’s hands. Because Freia asked me to let her live. Because she’s the visionary of a brand new world, a tactical genius who we can’t do without in our revolutionary campaigns. Because otherwise, her talent will be wasted on mass destruction and genocide. Because I saw the future, in which she razed Tenanulic and left you with only a few hundred cripples among the wasteland of Gurthal, because…”
Because I still love her? Did I ever love her? Did anyone love me? Freia only seeks redemption, Setsuna… Nayuta said she loved me, but she craves the strength I can give her, Kureha sees me as a paragon of justice, an idea rather than a man. And Norn? I was her spy… Maybe, she would use me, until I outlive my usefulness, and then…
The man got lost in his thoughts. So much so, that his own knees failed him and he almost crumbled on the ground right before Eve.
“…y… hey… Hey! Keyaruga!..” He remained deaf to the girl’s exclamation. In a haze, the man hardly even reacted to the reality, barely registered Eve’s attempts to grab him, to keep him from falling. As if hundreds of scrawny arms dragged him into hell, poisoning his tattered mind.
Oh? I passed out for a moment? That’s not good, how can I be strong, when I can’t even hold myself together?
Eve… Wait, what’s Eve doing? She holds me? Why? What can she achieve by that? What?..
“I’m fine, Eve.” The Hero of Healing said, wiping cold sweat from his forehead. It wasn’t a common occurrence for the man to lose his grip on reality that easily, and neither would he allow it to become one. “Let go.”
“No, you’re not, moron! What’s going on with you?” The kokuyoku scion asked somewhat harshly, refusing to break her embrace. She demanded at least some form of explanation. After all, why would anyone want to depend on someone, whose passions and suffering are beyond their comprehension?
“In the future I saw, you had to kill Norn for what she did, and I had to kill you. I hated it, so I’ll make my own destiny, where you and Norn will live.” Keyaruga announced, before patronizingly tapping Eve’s shoulder.
You’d become a Me-ua even without me. But that slut Panakea killed your man. Man… strange, he killed your friends, and you gave him two children… No matter, Panakea wants me to become your champion. And so I will. I will make you the queen myself.
“Thanks…” The maiden quietly said, taking a step back from her guardian. “For your honesty, I mean.” She added, puffing her cute cheeks. “You should get some rest, though.”
“No, I’m fine. And don’t thank me… You don’t even know what you were robbed off.” Keyaruga declared, rising in full height. Then, he turned toward his two other lovely companions. “Wake up, girls! We’re going after our breakfast now!”
After that, I’ll have to get back to the sphere. I’ll finally become a proper hero.
Finally, after so many labors, both physical and emotional, Keyaruga could enjoy a moment of peace. Forget about the war, ignore the fact that his ‘destined’ reunion with Eve was orchestrated by the goddess, bury his trauma under a layer of comfort. At least for now, anyway.
Keyaruga, Eve, Setsuna and Freia sat around a single table. They had plenty of expensive food, drinks (both alcoholic and not). Starters and snacks, soups and stews. All of that was paid from Karman’s wallet, of course.
“Allow us to thank you for your generosity.” Keyaruga said to the seller, after at least a minute of his silence. All that time the beastman spoke with Freia about her preferred cosmetics, Setsuna indulged him with a conversation about battle arts, and how some equipment could compliment certain moves, while debilitating others, and even Eve managed to have a comprehensive talk about how the world is turning to shit, referencing political crisis in Confederation.
“You know, I prefer to think of it as investments, rather than gifts. I don’t think you’ll disagree that trust is the most valuable asset.” Karman replied, seamlessly switching from speaking Tarenago with Eve to Phasian with Keyaruga. “Especially when I can enjoy the company of your beauties.”
“Yeah, well, I don’t really deserve these cuties.” The lad commented, taking a brief look at each of his companions.
“Keyaruga, you’re being too harsh on yourself.” The sorceress, who sat to the right from the healer, said, caringly covering the man’s hand with her own palm. For better or worse, she loved him dearly, which everyone around the table could tell. Except Keyaruga himself, to whom that seemed but a temporary passion from the princess, and even his own feelings he perceived as a desperate need for companionship.
“Uh-huh. You deserve Setsuna.” The girl to the left of him even went so far as to jump on the hero’s neck. In a peculiar way, the phlegmatic she-wolf was the beacon of positivity in the party. Not even her recent defeat changed that fact.
With those two Karman had literally no chances. Their infatuation to Keyaruga was still fresh, and even if it was otherwise, their loyalty wouldn’t shatter that easily. Eve, though, wasn’t among the man’s lovers, that much was for certain. So what did the green-haired beastman do? Well, at first, there was a smile. Then, a wink. Did it work? In some way…
“Mi nanpa wor midunarund (I’m not seeking for relationships right now).” Eve indeed noticed the merchant’s attempts to flirt, but she almost instantly cut it off.
“Haa… No luck for me here, I guess.” Karman shrugged, taking a sip of his favorite wine. He knew too well, how easy it was to lose a partner by standing between him and his girl. The vendor already had such a lesson, that he wouldn’t share with the red-haired ‘alchemist’.
“Speaking of luck, is the client satisfied with my potion?” The hero asked slyly. He had little appetite outside of the bare minimum for refilling his body and mind with energy, and yet he was glad to see his companions enjoying the feast.
“You’re a miracle-maker, pal, I’ll give you that! I’d even kiss you for what you did for us!” The merchant sneered, enjoying a fine beef goulash. “It healed the girl in one sip! Although…”
“It hasn’t healed her soul.” Keyaruga admitted, recalling the vigilante’s words. He saved the man both directly and indirectly. After all, it seemed like if nobody offered Nina a free remedy, he wouldn’t listen to Keara, and Blade would’ve squashed him. Would that be beneficial to the healer’s revenge?
Too much of ‘would’s for my liking.
“Basically… Eh, no matter, she’ll get through it, eventually. The girl’s dad went out for a hunt himself, though. Said he saw some chick going toe to toe with Blade, can you believe it? Damn, I hope she’s still kicking.” Karman noted, looking at Keyaruga indifferently shaking a cup of wine in his hands. Fortunately, at that point Setsuna and Freia got back to banqueting.
“Why wouldn’t I believe? I… hired her.” Although it took a little bit of lie, that brief explanation didn’t fail to attract the beastman’s ultimate interest. “She’s a killer, just so you know.”
“No… fucking way!” Karman swore, making sure his distressed is properly conveyed to everyone. Even if Blade’s ‘name’ was deliberately omitted.
“And look, what she brought me.” His astonishment got even greater, as the red-eyed lad grabbed an inconspicuous leather package from under the table and slowly levitated it right to the trader’s hands.
“Farafinatia Ahurama! Is this-?” The magic trick didn’t fail to impress the vendor, sure, but after he peeked inside… “Huh… This is what I think it is?” The merchant mused, evaluating the dirty tattered coat. The cuirass was in much better shape, but either way, he did recognize, who it belonged to. And right after that, the merchant unceremoniously tossed a heavy poach right in Keyaruga’s hand. In would smash his face, if not for the hero’s reaction, though.
“I’m buying this!” The vendor declared, hiding Blade’s clothes under the table, before some nosy folk beside them could tell, over whose demise was the transaction.
“Sold.” Keyaruga nodded, amused with how accurate his prediction turned out to be. The bag, filled with various jewels approximately equaling hundred of Jioral kadmi, Keyaruga hanged onto his belt. Probably, Karman would get even more from the victim’s father anyway. “Although, you shouldn’t sell these before Buranikka’s ‘guests’ get the hell out of here.” The lad warned the merchant, before nodding to Freia, so that the sorceress prepares the real goods.
“Heh, I knew it! My intuition never fails me!” Karman exclaimed, pointing his finger onto the man. His right arm shook in an gesture of enthusiastic endorsement.
“Really now? And what does it tell you now?” Keyaruga wondered, resting his chin onto his joined fingers.
“That you, my friend, didn’t just come here to brag on behalf of your mercenaries, or for a free meal. Ready to meet the market’s demands, alchemist?”
“Heh-heh.” The man chuckled, putting a box right between the dishes. Some were still untouched, some already empty, but what stimulated the monger’s appetite was within the container. “Take a look.”
And so he did. Karman pulled a peculiar monocle from his pocket, and proceeded to meticulously inspect each and every vessel among what Keyaruga presented to him.
“Thirty vials, huh? Restoration potions?” The beastman wondered, cautiously putting the last bottle of non-mixing double-colored liquid back in the box.
“Certainly. First comes the mundane effect – they mend your wounds. Then, this potion rejuvenates endurance. Dare I say, this is my masterpiece?” The red-haired man declared with pride.
“Did you also have to put your blood in it as well?” Karman asked, fighting with an urge to jump from the excitement.
“No, that was an exception.” The Hero of Healing shrugged casually.
“Exception this, exception that. You helped good people, that’s all that matters.” The green-haired man declared before closing the wooden box. “Alright, this is good stuff.”
“Won’t you give it a taste, then?” Keyaruga sneered, feeling like he discovered another golden mine.
“I’m a merchant, brother. I can tell, whether you’re pushing good stuff or not!” With that said, Karman offered the lad another poach with even greater amount of precious minerals as before. Keyaruga opened it, accessed, and silently accepted the payment, letting the beastman take his purchase. “Say, why won’t you sell it yourself?” The vendor pondered, tapping onto the precious box.
“What do you think I’m doing? Or you’re implying I have to spend days upon days, trying to cajole the locals to purchase my wares?” Keyaruga scoffed, and glanced at Setsuna, then Freia, and later Eve. All of them finished their meals, and just sat silently, waiting the healer to finish the transaction. Getting them to sell potions seemed like a good idea… but Keyaruga would never go for it.
“True, getting folk to trust you takes a while.” Karman spoke, impressed by the man’s sense in business. Not many wonder-mongers could actually profit, unless they were actually talented crooks. “I wonder if you also know, how much time I have to resell your potions.”
“Three days.” Keyaruga eagerly replied. “Today, tomorrow, and…”
“My, oh my! Can I be your first customer?” A deep and mannered voice resonated throughout the premise. It was a well-dressed gentleman, and his gentle tone had to himself pretty well.
“Certainly, I’m always rea…” Karman was ready to trade with the customer right there, but seeing Freia, Setsuna, and Eve jumping from their chairs and getting ready to battle put a halt to his intent.
“Careful, Keyaruga!” The Hero of Magic snarled, snatching her staff right from the thin air.
“Grrrr!” Setsuna growled, summoning the icy crust on her forearms. After a swift jump she found herself standing atop of the table, cautiously avoiding stepping into the food. The huntress, no matter how swollen her belly was, prepared for battle. To protect those she loved.
“…” And even Eve summoned a small constellation of bright stars. The group prepared for battle, they attracted attention from all the guests, most of which wisely decided to leave the restaurant through the second exit, some of which didn’t even pay.
“Have you come to finish your task, Organ?” The princess snarled, rapidly pumping her new staff with magic potency. Along with her two sisters-in-arms, the caster was ready for the second encounter with Hawkeye. “If so, we…”
“You will do nothing, Freia.” This time, though, Keyaruga was there to stand against the Champion. “Setsuna, please get off the table. This one came for me, apparently.” The Hero of Healing spoke smoothly, stepping next to Eve. With a single swipe, he extinguished her spell. “Don’t. This will hurt some passerby much more than him.” The man uttered, approaching the murderous archer.
“These girls are under my protection, good sir. Should you raise your blade on them, you’ll have to pass me first.” The red-haired man calmly declared, standing between Organ Trist and the table with his allies.
The tension kept rising, underneath Hawkeye’s indifferent façade Keyaruga noted a cold-blooded focus and the ultimate will. The sword, the bow, two hidden blades in his sleeves, a tiny firearm in the right gauntlet, a set of throwing knives, tiny razors and a pair of brass knuckles. Add a fighting capabilities to stand his ground against the very god of fencing, and the fact that most, if not all, of his comedically numerous weapons were heavily poisoned, and you get a recipe for a catastrophe.
Class: Divine Archer
Level: 34 ☆
Physical attack: 84
Physical defense: 91
Magic attack: 32
Magic defense: 53
Fencing: 5th level
Spearsmanship: 4th level
Archery: 7th level
Battle arts: 5th level
Throwing skills: 6th level
Healing magic: 1st circle
Blood of Artemis: Artemis’ descendant’s exclusive skill. Improves ranged attacks capabilities
Amber eyes: Artemis’ blessing. Greatly increases the user’s speed, reaction, and visual comprehension.
Heavenly precision: Divine Archer’s exclusive skill. Greatly boosts accuracy of ranged projectiles.
Yes… That didn’t look promising.
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